To Love a Monster

By: Vikki Gladstone

What happens when you love a Monster?

When you meet a Monster and look into their eyes and see that deep down, they really just want to be good.

Like a small child who has been told over and over again “You are a BAD child”.

One who has heard “You will NEVER amount to anything” and believed it

They just want to be good. 

They want to be good and cherished and, loved

So you take a chance

You decide that YOUR Monster deserves to be loved

And you look past their Monstrosity and love them to their very core

And you find that they are good after all.

They are good and kind and they love you back

As your love grows you both begin to trust

Slowly your Monster begins telling you their secrets

Those things that MADE them Monstrous

And you listen

Like a good lover does, you listen

And you commit their secrets to memory swearing to never tell

And you continue loving them

And it is easy at first

But then they tell you their worse secrets

The ones that REALLY made them Monstrous

And still, you never tell

And you continue loving them

What happens when you keep their secrets deep inside

Do you, by committing their secrets to memory, taint your own soul?

Do you become a little Monstrous yourself?

You, who consider yourself just and kind and Good

Do you become a little Monstrous?

When you sit and think about the impact of these things

How they tainted your Monster and made them “Bad”

How could you continue to be good with their secrets inside you?

You can’t tell anyone because you promised.

"Good" people keep their promises.

So then what?

Do you start seeing your soul as a sort of Monstrous Yin Yang?

With the good outweighing the Monstrous

Or do you find that instead of the deep black and stark white of the Yin Yang

That the soul is truly colored in shades of grey

With the lighter shades being the “Good” and the darkest shades being the “Monstrous”

When you look inside and really reflect

Do you find that you too are a bit Monstrous

Aren’t we all Monsters?

Don’t we all have secret places in ourselves that we keep hidden

Do we not all have a “Good” face we show

All the while keeping our inner Monster a secret

And if we too are Monsters

Do we take the chance and choose to love our own Monster?

Loving yourself is the greatest risk you will ever take

And the greatest gift you can give yourself

I challenge you all to take a leap of faith

Choose to love your Monster

And see what happens...

Life of Many Hats

A comment posted in Facebook Land by a relative made me stop and think for a moment.  It was said that she "wears too many hats".  And my thought was the following: 

Ah but my Dears, part of the wonderous side of life is the wearing of the hats.  (*said with a British accent*)  =)
A person can be so MANY things and get joy from them all. I am daughter, sister, mother, wife, aunt, niece, cousin, woman, Goddess... and that weird friend you try to explain to others.
These days my pastimes need their OWN hat closet.  I'm the Event Coordinator of my UU church group, Marketing Officer for my womens retreat group, I am a medieval Russian woman and Lady in Waiting to the Queen of Air and Darkness in my renaissance performing group and MOST recent, I am Victoria - a Lady from the 1860's and member of an accapella chorale that performs Christmas carols during the holiday season.
I am making my own costume, learning Christmas carols and working to conquer my fear of singing in public all while learning to walk in a hoop skirt. (Oh yeah, and working on that British accent I haven't mastered yet!)
The fun part is - each of these characters actually DOES have their own hat.  

PLUS, I have a "still in progress" pirate (leather pirate hat with fabulous feather plume) and steam punk character (top hat with brassy gears and pretty bits) in the back of this closet as well.

Life is varied and full and I am learning something new each day. A year ago I would NEVER have pictured myself here, in this place with the revolving hats.  But I also find that I am surrounded by wonderful family and good friends who are talented, creative and fun.  These people care about me, encourage me and ask me how I am feeling when I am under the weather.  I feel quite blessed.

I wish for all of you to find hats you LOVE to wear, whether for work or play.  May you look up one day and realize that you are surrounded by wonderful people wearing AMAZING hats who think you are awesome too!  

Namaste`
Vikki

Great Beginnings 10-17-2011

Me, myself and I, we occupy this space

We have three minds, but we share one face

There is so much in life we still want to see

So many types of people we would like to be

We have so much potential we want to reach

But second thoughts - and doubts of self

Leave us feeling too lost for speech

There is one part of our brain that shouts “Just do it”

The second part says calmly “your friends will help you through it”

The third part of our brain mumbles softly “you’ll never make it,

You don’t even have the talent to convincingly fake it”

So where do we find balance between “YES” and “no way”

How do we convince our self that today may be OUR day

How can we decide which direction we should take

When every path or venture could be a huge mistake

That’s the time to take a moment to quietly recall

We may feel insignificant, but we are part of the “Great All”

The Powers That Be created us to be exactly as we are

They believe in our ability to be a shining star

I think some fight constantly from the moment of our birth

To find a sense of purpose, courage and self worth

Even when surrounded by loving folks who think we can

We still have to search for that inner feeling of “I am”

I am Good enough, Smart enough, Strong enough

To reach the heights of my desires

I will not give in, I will not give up

Until I light my inner fires

It’s time to bring our minds together as one and choose which way to go

Decide that I AM good enough to audition for the show

I am brave enough to make it on this journey I have chosen

I WILL walk onto stage and not find myself frozen

So, when that spotlight hits me, and takes my breath away

I will close my eyes, take a breath and think “Today IS my day!”

Then I’ll smile and take a huge breath and find my inner voice

Because I CAN do it, just watch me – I am here by choice

~ Vikki, Just Vikki

   

Great Beginnings: 10-17-2011